On the road to finding myself… and taking wrong turns

Last year someone predicted that I will not write a blog post in next one year. Even though I sneered at him that time, and thought, "Who does he think he is… Paulo Octopus?" (Well I actually did not think of Octopus then, but something to that effect), but I (ashamedly) agree that his words have come true.

Well, I never said I was a serious writer, not even a true blogger. I don’t even write a daily diary, even though Bridget Jones is my all-time favourite heroine. Guess what, I have not even stood on a weight scale for more than three months. But I did eat lots of chocolates (not B&J), drank wine (not chardonnay), and more often than once saw myself embroiled knee-deep in a mess brought down by my own stupidity (not all of them involved men), and I guess… I hope I am guessing right… that my best friend is a gay. And that alone qualifies me as the biggest fan of Ms. Jones. I still occasionally jot down ideas and things I feel need to be spoken which I am sure nobody otherwise will give an attention to had I been speaking in person. So my blog exists…

While I was absconding from my blog (which is more like a sabbatical, I would like to believe) this is what I did. I read lots of chick (read trash)- lit, saw more movies in one year than I did in cumulative 30 years, gained ten lbs, and in between all these managed to do some work too.

After being reclused in my haven for more than a year, this morning, however, I was shaken awake from my reverie. It was one of my friends who came to say Hi to me at my work place, and after some “idhar udhar ki baatein, bageira bageira,” I bade him good-bye and said “good morning” with a curt of my head and a bow. Damn! That BBC drama last night. Who I was thinking I was? Elizabeth Bennett of P&P? I mean who says “good morning” in these days? I am sure my friend has never read a Jane Austen, but I can’t vouch he has not seen Casablanca. He might have recognized the pattern. Well, well… do not panic. Even if he suspects, I will say that was my alter personality. Oh No! Again Bitten By Evil and Anniyan.

So readers (if there are any*)! You might have guessed my problem now. Of late, my life has started resembling like a film, and I the heroine straight out of the page of a book which was accumulating dust in a library. But no more! I am going to pack all Austen novels today. I am just afraid of one fact. If I try to avoid acting like Emma today, I might go out and overdraft on my credit card a la Becky Bloomwood tomorrow, or worse, leave the car at home and take the broom to work. Now I am wondering Jessica Darling might like to include this post to her Do Better Storyteller Project? NO! STOP!

Hence, as a last resort to keep my sanity, I decided to vent out all my pent-up emotions in this blog. I hope, and I pray and hope it works, this will keep me from acting like a book character and help me move on with my life. But not now… that is for some time else. Till then, let me say a few more “Pray, tell me” and “upon my words” and “Oh! My dear, dear Mary Anne” (My friend’s name is Maria. Do you think she will realize that I changed her name?).

* Even if there is no reader, I can still depend on the Soulmate (who will arduously go through this post thrice, just to avoid to be put up with Meena Kumari – esque tears), and my vast in-laws clan (who more out of loyality and less of virtue will vouch this is the cleverest written post they have read in recent one-year past), and few friends and other family (who will click the button just to be shown on the cluster- map and in this way avoid getting nagged for the next 3-4 weeks). To them, whom I love most, I dedicate this post.

The Smiling Sky

If I have not discussed enough about British weather in my blogs, I have been given a chance today. Have a look at the picture below.

                                                                         Image source: www.metro.co.uk
No, I have not turned the photo upside down.

This is another example of just how freaky English weather can be. This inverted rainbow was seen in Cambridge yesterday. Apparently, the sunrays played some tricks and turned the rainbow upside down. Scientists call it circumzenithal arc. It looks like for a change British sky has replaced its sad face with a happy smiley icon. Or the weather is again making fun of us?

For more news, click here.

Life as a PG Student

The report was submitted today, late in the evening. I hoped to send the file and rush back home. But such an idea was nipped at the bud as Ms. Advisor who was still working at office…called to give insightful and thought provoking suggestions (to improve the report).I am at this moment little uneasy about the Viva next week. I can visualize the examiners with fingers on triggers, and shooting questions from three azimuths (three examiners recruited to evaluate one candidate). I had to give a review of literature and report of the outcome of my first experiment. I toiled most part of the last year in doing these. But, no the examiners are not so interested in the outcome of the experiment; rather they want to know what I want to do in next two years.Next two years?? I do not know what I am doing tomorrow. In my whole life I never planned a single thing. But then, probably this is one more of those translational skills research teaches you. Good for me. Even if I do not get a degree, I will hopefully learn some organizational skills.So at this moment I’m doing everything to prove that I am a potential researcher. These are lists of things I religiously do to make myself look like a researcher. Please keep on adding if you have any idea or suggestions and help a fellow PhD student.1. To look like a bright student… put lots of shimmering make-up. 2. Extremely motivated… well everyday I pull myself out of the bed, walk in the cold winter morning, reach my desk, and switch on the system. What else do you need to show motivation? 3. Effective communication skill…I talk and talk and talk and talk the hind legs off a donkey. Andno topic is spared, starting from philosophy to PNPC. 4. Original ideas……problem is there are too many ideas (and not all are relevant to do research). 5. Critical thinking…I often sit and stare blank at space. 6. Organizational skills.. . yet to develop. 7. Meeting deadlines… do u think they will let me live if I don’t do that. Chances are that you may see the university police @ your door if u did not turn up after three threatening emails from grad school office. 8. Completing project independently…Hmmm. Did not see anybody around when I was completing the project. So had to do it independently. I surely might have missed some important skills. Friends, please do remind me if you know anything, possibly with a suggestion how to achieve those. Continue the noble cause of helping a fellow (poor) PhD student. Good news is that I am not the only lost soul on the earth. Have a look. "I took an inventory of myself [as a researcher]. The resultsamazed me; it appears that I have most of the skills required to do research. Iknow how to use a computer to research information needed and use the library'sdatabase...the part I didn't know was...that there were [competent] and willingpeople behind the library's reference desk waiting for people like me to ask forhelp. I did not know they would help me if I needed help or maybe I just didn'twant to appear lazy or unintelligent... " Oscar L.

Frog Tales

This blog is created today… this moment. A report for the 1st yr PhD viva is due tomorrow, and procrastination has reached its highest peak. Surfing internet, listening to music, reading some “aga saga”, or breaking into a song with a croaky voice … all tried, tested and over used formulae to keep mind away from work have turned stale. The new trick was making a few call across the Atlantic, but friends did not budge much to my atrocities (how condescending… so what if it is their working hour???).

A quick chat with Manas confirmed the next plan. We both agreed on a single point (needless to say we generally agree at all points). Writing blogs are the new trend and sound quite savvy. Most people flash one… so high time I should have one myself. Also, HE won’t be able to say “tumhe padhai karne ka thoda bhi man nahi hai”.

Problem was getting an appropriate name for the blogspot. Surely, I do not have much to say in my blogs, other than my rattle tattles… nonsense ramblings… surreal ideas. But I do have some loyal, faithful listeners. The first blog-name that struck the mind was frog tales… like the Frog-grandma in Froggy tales, I tell my (non-sense) tales to my frog-grandchildren, and hope that some day some big frog will also come and listen to it. On the other side, just like the proverbial frog from the small pond who tells tales about the sea, I too am confined in my own pond and believe the pond to be the sea. Well, friends, those who know me, know that this is me… and that did not stop you having me as a friend. NA?

So, Frog Tale name was appropriate, I guess. There was some initial hitch……non-availability of an URL in the same name. Manas again came in handy and added “COCKTAIL” in front of FROG TALES (nothing more was expected of him at 2 am in the morning and with a blood-alcohol level beyond normal range).

So friends, this is the saga of cocktail of frog-tales. Before I get lost in Froggy world, let me go back to my long-pending work and finish the report for tomorrow. But with a promise to come back with more Froggy Tales.

Till then...

Croak Croak.